Return to Work

In my job at Prudential, I've heard or used the phrase "return to work" hundreds or thousands of times. I have a whole different perspective on those three simple words right now.

For quite some time I've been looking forward to getting back to the office. I love my home, but spending any more time there during the day would drive me crazy and I wanted to feel productive and dynamic again. Work gives me that.

When I returned to the office, I found big changes that have occurred. Familiar faces have left the company or our division, including our President Ed Baird. Changes everywhere have taken place including big changes within my own division. Plus my office was moved. So right now, in my second day, I'm reacclimating myself.

My voice has held out better than I thought, but I do have moments where I can't speak . . . which is awkward and difficult. My hearing has not been a problem at all yet, but with my first conference call I'll know better where we are there.

The main thing I'm working on now is seeing whether or not my body can take full-time hours or needs to come back on a part-time basis for the first month or so. Being me, instead of starting slow, I'm trying to do full-time hours this week. If I can't do it, then I figured I would adjust then. I just didn't want to come back part-time without trying to go full-time first.

Oh, one none work-related thing of note popped up. I was on the American Cancer Society's Cancer Surivor forums a couple days ago. I saw something that took a lot of pressure off me. It's very common for head/neck survivors not to be able to eat for even 9 months to a year following treatment. Here I've been beating myself up because it's a little over 2 months and I'm not eating yet. So, what I'm going through is very normal and I don't need to feel like I'm not doing enough. When I can get this PEG tube out of my stomach, and get to eating real food again . . . that will be incredible. I'm smiling just thinking about what the future holds for me.

Finally, I wanted to let people know that I've gained a little wait back and am at 180 (still about 30-40 pounds below pre-treatment wait). I look about the same size I did when I got out of college. And my hair is really coming in now. It's getting thicker and longer already. Soon I'll look like a hippy.